Sunday, February 21, 2016

More Workout Options For Exercise Haters

Still admittedly in the "rather cook than exercise" department, perhaps it is possible to get off the collective duff - and we don't mean Duff Beer - by watching Roscoe Arbuckle and Buster Keaton in The Cook, who both cook and dance with exceptional panache.

Another dancin' man: John Candy as Uncle Buck. We'll let that Three Stooges sound effect at 0:48 - rather jarring presented in a non-cartoony setting - slide because Mr. Candy is SO funny and that song, Laugh Laugh by the Beau Brummels is as catchy as it was in 1964.

To bring something remotely resembling enthusiasm to a Let's Dance decree and increase those "steps per day", emulate how gracefully Laurel & Hardy do the soft shoe here.

Better yet, do that Ed Norton and Ralph Kramden mambo from The Honeymooners.

One could get inspired by Zero Mostel, who thrilled audiences coast-to-coast by dancing up a storm starring in Fiddler On The Roof.

Zero was pretty darn wonderful doing a bit of terpsichore with Tommy Tune on The Dean Martin Show.

And then there's running, a very tough sell for anyone to whom sprinters wearing designer activewear bring to mind not good health but the tinhorn dictator authority wielded by overzealous high school gym teachers. At least in this clip from the 1928 Mack Sennett Studio comedy Run, Girl, Run we can enjoy Carole Lombard, who offscreen was a perennial Olympic gold medalist in good-natured bonhomie and the fine arts of friendship, hilariously ribald stories and outrageous one-liners.

Let's go bowling. . .

Then again, scratch that - let's not go bowling. Unlike Fred Flintstone, this blogger lacks classical ballet training.

Now Fred Flintstone was also a heckuva golfer and one today largely does not have to worry about losing a club or a ball inside the stomach of a critter on the endangered species list.

A certain key influence upon Fred Flintstone also gave golf a whirl. . .

Mr. Magoo thought he was the next best thing to Ben Hogan, Arnie Palmer and Jack Nicklaus.

And then there's Ridolini.

Unquestionably, Ridolini demonstrated fervor for the game on and off the links, but the only thing and Tiger Woods had in common was quite another game altogether: compulsive womanizing. There's more on that in the new bio of Ridolini.

In getting that ol' heart rate up, perhaps handball might be a good choice, too. Then again, maybe not.

Here's a panorama of sheer sporting ineptitude that would not make much of an infomercial (in that "do my workout program and you'll lose 26 pounds in 5 minutes" genre). The following compilation comprises some of the best films to ever emerge from the Mouse Factory - all of which we at this blog would love seeing on an official remastered Blu-ray release. Here are seven classic cartoons that demonstrate the comedy mojo of Disney's "Goof Unit", led by director Jack Kinney, in all its glory.

We close this disgustingly healthy post with The Goof's comeback, produced four decades later, Sport Goofy in Soccermania, directed by Darrell Van Citters.


Tré Taylor said...

I like where your mind goes. You are one funny guy Paul.

Barry Rivadue said...

Mostel was performing as Tevya from FIDDLER ON THE ROOF. "If I Were A Rich Man" is from that musical.

Paul F. Etcheverry said...

Thank you, Barry! That's quite a brain freeze and the correction has been made. In the immortal words of Chris Farley as motivational speaker Matt Foley, OOPS-A-DAISY! Or, as Ned Flanders would say, "pulled a boner" there. Anthony Quinn and Herschel Bernardi nailed the role, but where the heck did I get the notion that Zero was in one of the stage productions of Zorba The Greek?